blogitto ergo sum

July 23, 2007

#109 – Don’t dig Metrosexuals

Filed under: I was there, thoughts — yael wagner @ 13:20

metrosexuals

Wikipedia [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metrosexual] tells us it’s men who have a strong concern for their aesthetic appearance, and spend a substantial amount of time and money on their images and lifestyles…. Current trends have seen the metrosexual label placed upon male embracing of practices usually perceived to be feminine, rather than those specifically associated with stereotypically effeminate homosexuals…

A little trivia, also from wikipedia: Metrosexual is also a term joked upon people in Mexico City, as the subway system for the area is called Metro; this led to a non-related association that the word means person who has sex in the subway.

I don’t dig metrosexuals. Don’t get me wrong; all men may get manicure, wear pink, red and orange dress shirts, know a good hair die from a bad one, and may tell me that my shoes are sooo last year’s. I’ll be the first in line to take my gay friends shopping, treating them as my very dear personal fashion consultants. Gregory, Christoph (Boston/Paris) and Howie (NYC) have done that, and, truth to be told, have been very good at that too. much better than me, that’s for sure.

Meeting or dating metrosexuals is a whole different story. Sorry, i don’t look at a tree and think SOLACE. I can’t observe and absorb reality, and then just talk about it… i want to be part of it, like the butterfly that with its fluttering wings causes a hurricane elsewhere. It makes life so much more interesting.

My inner, supper-sensitive self may force you to listen to hours of pointless discussions of mythological-X G, disaster date with M and the likes. While some metrosexuals may call this part of the post-traumatic “healing”, I, well, call it venting, processing, sharing… Between us, talking about it with friends beats the shrink’s sofa or armchair; and the drinks are much better too.

To their credit, metrosexuals, as part of their “understanding” self, are obliged to work harder on their partner’s orgasms. no one will say they are selfish men who care only about their own pleasure. still they fall asleep too fast after the act, cuddling or not.
You may ask, if they listen like a girlfriend, work harder in the sack and don’t view sweat as a manly aphrodisiac (don’t even ask) what’s the problem? for one, not only they are understanding, but also they WANT to be understood. They ponder, have deep thoughts, and what’s worse, they no longer feel it’s their gender role to be handymen.

So there’s a potential promise for better sex, but a waver on many other useful functions previously delivered by men. yes, the metrosex may cook wonderful gourmet dinners, but if i get stuck with my car, the best help he may offer is a phone number for his designer-style mechanic. and forget the clogged toilet.

Didn’t it take 14 months for my car plate to get screwed to the car and be properly presented? needless to say, it was done by a female friend!

I’m now reading “Why Men Don’t Listen and Women Can’t Read Maps” by Allen and Barbara Pease (for more info go to: http://www.peaseinternational.com/infomenwomen.html). and, you guessed wrong – i got it from a man, whom for all i know (haven’t looked into it deep enough yet), is less metro and more sexual.

For the record: i can listen AND read maps. and get lost driving just like the next guy.

Clipart credits:

“Trendy urban Daleks” from http://www.nearingzero.net/extrat/screenres/extrat011.jpg

“Butterfly flutter” from http://home.swbell.net/moonshad/butterfly.gif

July 7, 2007

#108 Craig and I (I)

Filed under: Hmm Interesting, I was there, thoughts — yael wagner @ 0:49

Craig’s List that is, as in http://sfbay.craigslist.org/

There’s nothing simple and straight forward about relocation. It’s tough, frustrating, and takes much longer than the time it takes for one’s belongings to arrive. Relocation is not about an address change, it’s about a life change.

Did you ever consider how lonely it is?

Your freezer and fridge become your best friends.

Damn loneliness. A weekend with hardly a reason to use your vocal cords… the only thing that grows is the size of your cloths and the number of outfits that no longer fit…

No more. Thanks to Craig’s list.

I think it was Debbie F. that told me about Craig’s “strictly platonic” (http://sfbay.craigslist.org/cgi-bin/personals.cgi?category=stp). So, on a Sunday morning, I posted my ad. “Relocated, and want to feel @ home” was the title. Watching too many Law & Order episodes, I specified the activities I considered strictly platonic; “from movie to a hike, caf’e, show…talk”.

I leaned back and waited.

Naturally, expect no names, photos, or anything that may identify a guy.

First the Worstraining men

First to respond were the not-so-platonic.

“A” newsflash was: “I am M/32/SanJose. Tall (5′ 11”, slim, fit, runner, clean shaven, and always smell good (AXE!)). I am married but my wife is out of country. So, I am looking for some company this week-end. Interested?”

I really felt sorry for his loneliness. I wonder how his wife feels about it.

“B” is a subtle kind of a guy: “We could do that, or other things that don’t require going out? Interested?”

Then there were the complex, weird, seeking support kind of guys.

The extreme one was “C”. Imagine starting a wonderful friendship with the following monologue:

“Hi. My name is “C”. I’m a 42 yr old white single, prof. male. I’m very open minded, spontaneous,
athletic, fit, sexual, romantic and I have a great personality….. I live in Pacific Heights. I enjoy going to the beach, mts.,parks and the city. I work in the mortgage industry. I also have season’s tickets for the Giants. Hope to talk to you soon,”

I was curios, and gave him my phone number. Now (hiding a smile), one may say MANY things about me, but “nice” is most definitely NOT the first that comes to mind (hiding an even wider smile). So, when on the first call I was told 5 times that “you are nice, you are so nice…” I knew that we may have a problem. Or at least “C” has. And what is a professional male anyway? What one needs to do in order to move from amateur to professional?

To Be Continued

July 5, 2007

just a thought

Filed under: Hmm Interesting, thoughts — yael wagner @ 4:15

The drawing below was done by http://wellingtongrey.net, the data taken from http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=image:bmi30chart.png&oldid=107854217.

one question: if one is a resident of one country, and a citizen of another, which country takes credit for one’s obesity?

the chart itself can be found @ http://www.wellingtongrey.net/miscellanea/archive/2007-05-06–world-fatness.png

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